Refs:How Long People Want Sex To Last Versus How Long Sex Actually Lasts
In one study, 152 heterosexual couples in Canada were asked for their input [1]. Women said that, on average, intercourse usually lasts about 7 minutes, while foreplay lasts about 11 minutes. Men reported pretty similar numbers: they estimated intercourse at 8 minutes and foreplay at 13. In other words, heterosexual adults think that sex typically lasts somewhere around 18-21 minutes.
When it came to their ideal, women said they’d like intercourse to last for 14 minutes and foreplay to last 19 minutes, while men said they’d like to spend 18 minutes on each activity. So the ideal sex session clocks in at 33-36 minutes.
Research has found that when people force themselves to have sex more often (by doubling their sexual frequency), it backfires and makes sex feel more like a chore than anything [2]. It stands to reason that forcing yourself to spend more time on sex could potentially have a similar impact if it makes sex feel less natural.
[1] Miller, S. A., & Byers, E. S. (2004). Actual and desired duration of foreplay and intercourse: Discordance and misperceptions within heterosexual couples. Journal of Sex Research, 41(3), 301-309.
[2]Loewenstein, G., Krishnamurti, T., Kopsic, J., & McDonald, D. (2015). Does increased sexual frequency enhance happiness?. Journal of Economic Behavior & Organization, 116, 206-218.
